NEGOTIATION ... in your job... with your associates and colleague... with your customers... with your suppliers... with your superior... with your team ... with your subordinate... in your personal activities, such as land buying, etc.
Informal Negotiation
There are times when there is a need to negotiate more informally. At such times, when a difference of opinion arises, it might not be possible or appropriate to go through the stages set out above in a formal manner. Nevertheless, remembering the key points in the stages of formal negotiation may be very helpful in a variety of informal situations.
Why Negotiate?It is inevitable that, from time-to-time, conflict and disagreement will arise as the differing needs, wants, aims and beliefs of people are brought together. Without negotiation, such conflicts may lead to argument and resentment resulting in one or all of the parties feeling dissatisfied. The point of negotiation is to try to reach agreements without causing future barriers to communications.
Stages of NegotiationIn order to achieve a desirable outcome, it may be useful to follow a structured approach to negotiation. For example, in a work situation a meeting may need to be arranged in which all parties involved can come together. The process of negotiation includes the following stages:PreparationDiscussionClarification of goalsNegotiate towards a Win-Win outcomeAgreementImplementation of a course of action
1. PreparationBefore any negotiation takes place, a decision needs to be taken as to when and where a meeting will take place to discuss the problem and who will attend. Setting a limited time-scale can also be helpful to prevent the disagreement continuing. (This stage involves ensuring all the pertinent facts of the situation are known in order to clarify your own position.)In the work example above, this would include knowing the ‘rules’ of your organisation, to whom help is given, when help is not felt appropriate and the grounds for such refusals. Your organisation may well have policies to which you can refer in preparation for the negotiation.Undertaking preparation before discussing the disagreement will help to avoid further conflict and unnecessarily wasting time during the meeting.
2. DiscussionDuring this stage, individuals or members of each side put forward the case as they see it, i.e. their understanding of the situation. (Key skills during this stage are questioning, listening and clarifying.Sometimes it is helpful to take notes during the discussion stage to record all points put forward in case there is need for further clarification. It is extremely important to listen, as when disagreement takes place it is easy to make the mistake of...... saying too much and listening too little..... Each side should have an equal opportunity to present their case.
3. Clarifying GoalsFrom the discussion, the goals, interests and viewpoints of both sides of the disagreement need to be clarified. It is helpful to list these in order of priority. Through this clarification it is often possible to identify or establish common ground.
4. Negotiate Towards a Win-Win OutcomeThis stage focuses on what is termed a Win-Win outcome where both sides feel they have gained something positive through the process of negotiation and both sides feel their point of view has been taken into consideration. A Win-Win outcome is usually the best result. Although this may not always be possible, through negotiation, it should be the ultimate goal.Suggestions of alternative strategies and compromises need to be considered at this point. "Compromises" are often positive alternatives which can often achieve greater benefit for all concerned compared to holding to the original positions.
5. AgreementAgreement can be achieved once understanding of both sides’ viewpoints and interests have been considered. It is essential to keep an open mind in order to achieve a solution. Any agreement needs to be made perfectly clear so that both sides know what has been decided.
6. Implementing a Course of ActionFrom the agreement, a course of action has to be implemented to carry through the decision.
Failure to AgreeIf the process of negotiation breaks down and agreement cannot be reached, *** then re-scheduling a further meeting is called for. This avoids all parties becoming embroiled in heated discussion or argument, which not only wastes time but can also damage future relationships.At the subsequent meeting, the stages of negotiation should be repeated. Any new ideas or interests should be taken into account and the situation looked at afresh. At this stage it may also be helpful to look at other alternative solutions and/or bring in another person to mediate.
3 elementsIn any negotiation, the following three elements are important and likely to affect the ultimate outcome of the negotiation:1. Attitudes2. Knowledge3. Interpersonal Skills
AttitudesAll negotiation is strongly influenced by underlying attitudes to the process itself, ....for example attitudes to the issues and personalities involved in the particular case or .....attitudes linked to personal needs for recognition.Always be aware that: ....Negotiation is not an arena for the realisation of individual achievements.There can be resentment of the need to negotiate by those in authority. Certain features of negotiation may influence a person’s behavior, for example some people may become defensive.
KnowledgeThe more knowledge you possess of the issues in question, the greater your participation in the process of negotiation. In other words, *good preparation* is essential.Do your homework and gather as much information about the issues as you can.Furthermore, the way issues are negotiated must be understood as negotiating will require different methods in different situations.
nterpersonal SkillsThere are many interpersonal skills required in the process of negotiation which are useful in both formal settings and in less formal one-to-one situations.These skills include:...Effective verbal communication. * Reducing misunderstandings* is a key part of effective negotiation. See our pages: Reflection and Clarification for more information....Build Rapport. ...Build stronger working relationships based on mutual respect....Problem Solving. ...Decision Making. ...Assertiveness. An essential skill for building successful interpersonal relationships. ....Dealing with Difficult Situations. ....The Art of Tact and Diplomacy, Communicating in Difficult Situations and Dealing with Criticism.
Negotiation is........ a means of resolving differences between people. In the process of negotiation, not only are different opinions are taken into account, but also individual needs, aims, interests and differences in background and culture. Different ways we may negotiate including;...the WIN-LOSE approach, also known as bargaining or haggling. ...the WIN-WIN approach to negotiation, which is preferable when you want to build a meaningful and strong interpersonal relationship.
The Win-Lose Approach to NegotiationNegotiation is sometimes seen in terms of ‘getting your own way’, ‘driving a hard bargain’ or ‘beating off the opposition’. While in the short term bargaining may well achieve the aims for one side, it is also a WIN-LOSE approach. This means that while one side wins the other loses and this outcome may well damage future relationships between the parties. It also increases the likelihood of relationships breaking down, of people walking out or refusing to deal with the ‘winners’ again, and the process ending in a bitter dispute.*WIN-LOSE bargaining* is probably the most familiar form of negotiating that is undertaken. Individuals decide what they want, then each side takes up an extreme position, such as asking the other side for much more than they expect to get. Through haggling – the giving and making of concessions – a compromise is reached, and each side’s hope is that this compromise will be in their favour.A typical example is haggling over the price of a car:“What do you want for it?”“I couldn’t let it go for under £2,000.”“I’ll give you £1,000.” “You must be joking.”“Well, £1,100 and that’s my limit.”“£1,900” … “£1,300” … “£1,700” ... “£1,500” … “Done.”Both parties need good assertiveness skills to be able to barter or haggle effectively.While this form of bargaining may be acceptable in the used car market, for most situations it has drawbacks. These can have serious consequences if applied to social situations. For example:It may serve to turn the negotiation into a conflict situation, and can serve to damage any possible long-term relationship.It is essentially dishonest – both sides try to hide their real views and mislead the other.The compromise solution may not have been the best possible outcome – there may have been some other agreement that was not thought of at the time - an outcome that was both possible and would have better served both parties.Agreement is less likely to be reached as each side has made a public commitment to a particular position and feels they must defend it, even though they know it to be an extreme position originally.While there are times when bargaining is an appropriate means of reaching an agreement, such as when buying a used car, generally a more sensitive approach is preferable. Negotiation concerning other people’s lives is perhaps best dealt with by using an approach which takes into account the effect of the outcome on thoughts, emotions and subsequent relationships.
The Win-Win Approach to NegotiationMany professional negotiators prefer to aim towards what is known as a WIN-WIN solution. This involves looking for resolutions that allow both sides to gain. Negotiators aim to work together towards finding solution to their differences that result in both sides being satisfied. Key points when aiming for a WIN-WIN outcome include: ...Focus on maintaining the relationship - ‘separate the people from the problem’....Focus on interests not positions. Generate a variety of options that offer gains to both parties before deciding what to do....Aim for the result to be based on an objective standard.
Focus on Maintaining the RelationshipThis means not allowing the disagreement to damage the interpersonal relationship, not blaming the others for the problem and aiming to confront the problem not the people. This can involve actively supporting the other individuals while confronting the problem. Remember, separate the people from the problem.Disagreements and negotiations are rarely ‘one-offs’. At times of disagreement, it is important to remember that you may well have to communicate with the same people in the future. For this reason, it is always worth considering whether ‘winning’ the particular issue is more important than maintaining a good relationship.All too often disagreement is treated as a personal affront. Rejecting what an individual says or does is seen as rejection of the person. Because of this, many attempts to resolve differences degenerate into personal battles or power struggles with those involved getting angry, hurt or upset.Remember negotiation is about finding .....an agreeable solution to a problem,.... not an excuse to undermine others, therefore, to avoid negotiation breaking down into argument, it is helpful to consciously separate the issues under dispute from the people involved. For example, it is quite possible to hold people in deep regard, to like them, to respect their worth, their feelings, values and beliefs, and yet to disagree with the particular point they are making. One valuable approach is to continue to express positive regard for an individual, even when disagreeing with what he/she is saying. The following are examples of statements that might be used by a good negotiator:“You’ve expressed your points very clearly and I can now appreciate your position. However...”“It’s clear that you are very concerned about this issue, as I am myself. Yet from my viewpoint...”Another way of avoiding personal confrontation is to avoid blaming the other party for creating the problem. It is better to talk in terms of the impact the problem is having personally, or on the organisation or situation, rather than pointing out any errors.Instead of saying:“You’re making me waste a lot of time by carrying on with this argument,”the same point could be presented as,“I’m not able to spend a lot of time on this problem, I wonder if there’s any way we could solve it quickly?”By not allowing ‘disagreements over issues’ to become ‘disagreements between people’, a good relationship can be maintained, regardless of the outcome of the negotiation.
Focus on Interests Not PositionsRather than focusing on the other side’s stated position, consider the underlying interests they might have. What are their needs, desires and fears?.....These might not always be obvious from what they say. When negotiating, individuals often appear to be holding on to one or two points from which they will not move. For example, in a work situation an employee might say “I am not getting enough support” while the employer believes that the person is getting as much support as they can offer and more than others in the same position. However, the employee's underlying interest might be that he or she would like more friends or someone to talk to more often. By focusing on the interests rather than the positions, a solution might be that the employer refers the employee to a be friending organisation so that his or her needs can be met.Focusing on interests is helpful because: It takes into account individual needs, wants, worries and emotions.There are often a number of ways of satisfying interests, whereas positions tend to focus on only one solution. While positions are often opposed, individuals may still have common interests on which they can build. Most people have an underlying need to feel good about themselves and will strongly resist any attempt at negotiation that might damage their self-esteem. Often their need to maintain feelings of self-worth is more important than the particular point of disagreement. Therefore, in many cases, the aim will be to find some way of enabling both sides to feel good about themselves, while at the same time not losing sight of the goals. If individuals fear their self-esteem is at risk, or that others will think less highly of them following negotiation, they are likely to become stubborn and refuse to move from their stated position, or become hostile and offended and leave the discussion.Understanding the emotional needs of others is an essential part of understanding their overall perspective and underlying interests. In addition to understanding others’ emotional needs, understanding of your own emotional needs are equally important.***It can be helpful to discuss how everyone involved feels during negotiation.Another key point is that...... decisions should not be forced upon others. This is a negotiation. Both sides will feel much more committed to a decision if they feel it is something they have helped to create and that their ideas and suggestions have been taken into account. It is important to clearly express your own needs, desires, wants and fears so that others can also focus on your interests. See our page: Assertiveness.
Generate a Variety of Options that Offer Gains to Both SidesRather than looking for one single way to resolve differences, it is worthwhile considering a number of options that could provide a resolution and then to work together to decide which is most suitable for both sides. ***Techniques such as brainstorming could be used to generate different potential solutions. In many ways, negotiation can be seen as a problem solving exercise, although it is important to focus on all individuals’ underlying interests and not merely the basic difference in positions.Good negotiators will spend time finding a number of ways of meeting the interests of both sides rather than meeting self-interest alone and then discussing the possible solutions.
Aim for the Result to be Based on an Objective StandardHaving identified and worked towards meeting shared interests, it is often inevitable that some differences will remain. Rather than resorting to a confrontational bargaining approach, which may leave individuals feeling let-down or angry, it can be helpful to seek some fair, objective and independent means of resolving the differences. It is important that such a basis for deciding is:...Acceptable to both parties....Independent to both parties....Can be seen to be fair.If no resolution can be reached, it may be possible to find some other, independent party whom both sides will trust to make a fair decision. Other sources of help who might assist in situations which cannot be resolved include:A mutual friend or colleague A committee member A trained mediator Before turning for help from such sources however it is important to agree that this approach is acceptable to both sides.
Misunderstanding is a common cause of negotiations breaking down.Such breakdowns may occur due to differences of viewpoint, background or cultures as well as many other factors. In negotiation especially it is possible not to ‘hear’ what others intend to say due to lack of assertiveness on the part of the other person or ineffective listening.This page covers some ways that misunderstandings in negotiation can be reduced helping to pave the way for a successful negotiation.Because misunderstandings in negotiation can easily occur, it is important to: ...Clarify individual goals....State the issues clearly....Consider all viewpoints....Clarifying meaning.
Never fear!Let us never negotiate out of fear, but let us never fear to negotiate.John F. Kennedy. Inaugural Address - 20 January 1961
Clarify the GoalsIt is essential to have a clear understanding of what the other side is seeking to achieve. This is not always what they initially state as their aims. Looking at interests often allows for an understanding of the real goals. Similarly, it is worthwhile clearly stating what your own goals are so that both parties can work together to seek mutual benefit......State the Issues ClearlyIt is important to identify the real issues involved and discard those that are not relevant. This enables the focus of the negotiation to remain firmly fixed on the interests and differences of the individuals involved, without argument spreading to other areas of work.Consider all Viewpoints During negotiation, a great deal of time can be spent in establishing the facts. However, it should be realised that ‘facts’ tend to provide another area over which to disagree. Another person’s worries, even if totally unfounded, are still real worries and need to be taken into consideration.Conflicts often arise because of differences in personal viewpoints. Remember that to accept and understand someone else’s viewpoint does not imply agreement with that point of view. Rather, it shows respect for the person and the wish to work together to find a mutually satisfactory solution. Similarly, it is helpful to encourage the other person to understand your viewpoint. An open, honest and accepting discussion of the differences in perspective will often help to clarify the issues and provide the way forward to a resolution.
FinallyNegotiation is a process by which people resolve disagreements. Structured negotiation follows a number of stages from preparation through to implementation. If possible, a WIN-WIN approach is more desirable than a bargaining (WIN-LOSE) approach. This involves seeking resolutions that allow both sides to gain, while at the same time maintaining good working relationships with the other parties involved.Find more at:
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